Posts Tagged ‘High School’

Walkway of Hell

Sunday, June 9th, 2013

You’re the boy I can’t keep my eyes off. You’re the boy that as I walk through the halls I see you and blush. You’re the one I’ve had a crush on for years now, you’re the one who won’t like me back.

Captured by Tiffany Tremaine.

Captured by Tiffany Tremaine.

We talk like best friends, act like sweethearts, but we are just friends. All the effort I’ve put in has placed me in this place of friends. But friends is better than strangers. At least it lets me in your life. Your life of confusion and lost love. You’re fighting for a girl who doesn’t love you back. So why don’t you just turn around and let me. I’d show you compassion no other girl would. I’d show you the love I’ve stored up in my chest.

But your happiness isn’t mine to bring. It’s hers. The girl you are fighting so hard for. She’s the one who holds your heart. But I’ll hold your hand and walk beside you down this walkway of hell. I’ll help you get through this broken heart of yours. But I won’t forget the feelings I’ve buried. I’ll push them away so we can be happy.

Captured by Tiffany Tremaine.

Captured by Tiffany Tremaine.

I’ll push them away so I can help you find love. I’ll push them away till I’m convinced they’re gone. But deep down, I’ll always know. Deep down I’ll hate how I never stood up and kissed you. Deep down, I’ll be ashamed. But up front, I am happy. I am here. I am well. I show no sign of the war I’ve fought. I show no sign of the pain I’ve seen.

I’ll store that love for the one who will return it. I’ll store that compassion for someone who will appreciate it. I’ll save myself for someone who is right. I just hope that he’s waiting for me just as I am for him.

 

Photography by Tiffany Tremaine.

The Overdose

Wednesday, June 13th, 2012

This is a Fictional monologue.

So the day it happened I had had a bad day at school, some kids had picked on me and I just felt horrible. So when I got home I was already in craps-ville. I walked in the door and knew instantly my dad was drunk. Everything was everywhere. Pictures smashed, chairs broken, fabric on the groud… It was really frightening… so I headed upstairs, prepared to be there all night… but then I heard him screaming at me from the bottom of the stairs. He was yelling at me saying I was a mistake, they never wanted me, and that I’d grown into something he couldn’t control, some demon he didn’t want. He swore at me, calling me names… then he said it was my fault moms dead. I knew it wasn’t true but that hurt. It was a low blow. So I stood there watching him as he screamed at me, smashing everything in sight. He had never been this bad.

So when I knew he wouldn’t notice if I left I ran up the stairs, locked my door and cried. I cried for hours. There

I’ll sure miss this place…

was no one I could tell, no one I could talk to, no one I trusted… So I sat alone. Then I got up, walked around my room picking things up and setting them back down. Then I picked up the bottle of Tylonal… before I knew what I was doing I had downed 10 or 11… Then I picked up a pad of paper and wrote a note to everyone I cared about. To everyone who might care. Apologizing. Telling why and what happened. Being fully honest. But then my dad came to my door, begging I come out and listen to him. So I did. I went downstairs to find he had cleaned it up a bit. He sat on the couch with his head in his hands… and he apologized, he said that he just missed mom, and something came over him, that he knows it was wrong to yell, but he felt so alone. So I took a step forward and hugged him, knowing this may very well be the last time I ever did it. Then I whispered “I love you” and turned to go upstairs. I got only about halfway up the stairs when everything went blurry, I tried speeding up but I fell over, and went down the stairs. The last thing I remember was my dad running towards my body, and me whispering, “I’m sorry” and it all went black.

And now I guess I’m dead. I’m talking to myself… but not? And who are you? Someone to judge if I get to live? How should you get that power? I don’t know if I want to live or not. I just want everyone to know that this could have been stopped. I hope you make the right choice… *turn around and start walking away then turn suddenly around*

Wait, before you choose. I love my dad more than anything in this world, no matter what he said or did… Maybe it would be easier if I never went back… maybe if I left him alone he would finally be able to move on… to be happy.

The Perfect Date

Monday, May 14th, 2012

Have you ever wondered what the perfect date was? Well Sophie wondered what the perfect date, kiss, hug, moment, and everything is… but she was too scared to do anything. But one day, this boy Jack, one of the most popular and cutest boys in school, came up to her and asked her on a date. After realizing he wasn’t kidding she stuttered a yes, he then asked her where she lived and what her phone number was. Sophie was in grade 10 and has black hair with different colours all through it. She doesn’t think she’s all that attractive, but Jack couldn’t think anything but. He thinks she’s gorgeous. Jack is in grade 11 and has a cute brown do. He is super cute and liked by many, but hangs out with a smaller group of friends, even though he wouldn’t have trouble being popular. Saturday arrived and Sophie was up early, but Jack also was.

Sure looks like a fairy tale huh?

When Sophie was waiting for Jack to arrive she was pacing all over the house freaking out… she had been stressing about it all week. She really wanted everything to be perfect.  When she heard his heavy steps on the stair her heart did a few flutters then a huge back-flip and when she heard his knock she didn’t want to seem too eager so she walked slowly and opened the door. But as she did so the grin upon his face made her heart sail.

It was their first date so it was nothing too formal, just a picnic date. So she got in his truck with the lunch on her lap. There was a small awkward silence but he broke it by turning on the music and clumsily singing along. Then she started to sing and he stopped and just listened. Then when she started to notice that he wasn’t singing he began to sang along again laughing the whole time.

When they got to the park they were trying not to pass out from laughing so hard. He took her into a small area that wasn’t too crowded, there was a small stream and he thought it would be perfect. It was, instead of eating right away he pulled her out and they tossed a football and he threw it too far and she backed up into the stream.

He ran over and she was laughing so hard she was crying. But when he reached down to grab her up she pulled him down into it, trying not to crush her he pulled her from under him and started splashing her, soaking her shorts and his. By the time they were done they were soaked to the bone. She went over and laid in the sun, he pulled off his shirt and she opened her eyes and gasped, he had a gorgeous body.

They pulled out the food and chatted the whole time, this day was starting to be perfect. Right as they were finishing their food it started to rain. Sophie was upset, thinking their picnic was ruined, but Jack didn’t seem to care. He just pulled her into the rain and danced, singing the songs they sang in the truck. Then she started singing a different one, a slow one, and he knew it but just pulled her close, humming the melody, her voice died down slowly and they just rocked, and as she looked up into those beautiful green eyes, wet hair, and rain falling between them, she knew this day was perfect, and couldn’t get any better. That is until he leaned down and she closed her eyes her heart leaping, and kissed her. Slow at first then wanting her closer.

He pulled away laughing, and a tiny laugh bubbled up to her lips, she realized her hands were in his hair, having just going up there without her noticing. She lowered them but before she could let him go he grabbed her hand. He then said they probably should leave so they don’t both get sick. As they walked back they swung their arms, she hadn’t said anything since the kiss, and he thought maybe she was nervous. But she just couldn’t form any words, her mind was still swirling.

When they got in the truck he threw his shirt in the back, knowing it would be no use having it on. She opened her mouth to say something but instead reached for the radio and started singing the country song that was on. The ride home was pretty much the same as the ride there, except only they held hands the way home. Sophie now knows what the perfect date is. Her questions answered she does this every weekend with Jack. Making it a constant reminder of how their first date went.