Each Day

Longer day’s shorter nights.
This just feels so right.
Life in the sun living life.
What could go wrong?

WindblownTanning our skin; golden.
It won’t look olden.
Behold a time that is so bright.
Where nothing’s wrong.

Summer flings make life fun.
Time under the sun.
Laughing and fooling around.
Just summer love.

Days get shorter, nights long
Where did we go wrong?
Sweaters covering pale skin.
So far away.

The sun isn’t as warm now,
When the snow is plowed.
The cold flakes tingle my skin.
But melt so fast.

Burning Away

Treasure the time we have.
With a nice warm laugh.
That always is filled with love.
Never forget.

Time will never stand still.
For you or for Bill.
So try to treasure each day.
Each day we live.

Photography by Tiffany Tremaine

Walkway of Hell

You’re the boy I can’t keep my eyes off. You’re the boy that as I walk through the halls I see you and blush. You’re the one I’ve had a crush on for years now, you’re the one who won’t like me back.

Captured by Tiffany Tremaine.

Captured by Tiffany Tremaine.

We talk like best friends, act like sweethearts, but we are just friends. All the effort I’ve put in has placed me in this place of friends. But friends is better than strangers. At least it lets me in your life. Your life of confusion and lost love. You’re fighting for a girl who doesn’t love you back. So why don’t you just turn around and let me. I’d show you compassion no other girl would. I’d show you the love I’ve stored up in my chest.

But your happiness isn’t mine to bring. It’s hers. The girl you are fighting so hard for. She’s the one who holds your heart. But I’ll hold your hand and walk beside you down this walkway of hell. I’ll help you get through this broken heart of yours. But I won’t forget the feelings I’ve buried. I’ll push them away so we can be happy.

Captured by Tiffany Tremaine.

Captured by Tiffany Tremaine.

I’ll push them away so I can help you find love. I’ll push them away till I’m convinced they’re gone. But deep down, I’ll always know. Deep down I’ll hate how I never stood up and kissed you. Deep down, I’ll be ashamed. But up front, I am happy. I am here. I am well. I show no sign of the war I’ve fought. I show no sign of the pain I’ve seen.

I’ll store that love for the one who will return it. I’ll store that compassion for someone who will appreciate it. I’ll save myself for someone who is right. I just hope that he’s waiting for me just as I am for him.


Photography by Tiffany Tremaine.

So Lost

This is a fictional monologue.

I’m one of those people that don’t like hurting others. They can’t hurt them even if it means saving themselves. They would rather stab their own back then stab someone who has stabbed theirs tons of times. They’d take a bullet for their worst enemy. Because seeing others in pain, hurts them.

I feel so lost… I lost myself in the process of trying to find out who I really am. I’m gone; the old, happy me is gone… she’s vanished… I look in my mirror and see a girl with swollen, bloodshot eyes. With puffy lips and pink cheeks. I see a girl who has dug herself too deep. I see pain behind her eyes that she hides oh so well.

But at school, she’s so different. I see a bright, but fake, smile. I see eyes that have seen terrible things and lips that have been bitten to the point of breaking. But I don’t see myself. I never see that happy girl anymore. She’s gone. She’s been hurt too much to count. Too much to rebound.

That girl is buried too deep in pain. She’s drowned.

But that doesn’t mean I don’t want her back, I want to smile and feel love and be happy. I want someone to unconditionally love me for me. But that won’t ever happen right.


Every time I hear the crash of thunder and see the strike of lightning, I think back to that time lying on my bed with my brother, trying to record it. I remember his arm around me when I was scared. And how the air was heavy with static electricity. And I remember our laughs filling the air and that was when I felt safe. I haven’t had that kind of safe in a while. I haven’t felt that care free in a while. I miss being so innocent. I miss being in the same house with my whole family. I miss being young.

My brothers were always so protective of me. They were always so funny. And they fought a lot. But we always loved each other. Through the blood, sweat, and tears. Now I finally understand what that means.

Growing up with boys has made me a stronger person. It has made me appreciate the delicate things in life, and it has made me confident.

My brothers have all given me different kind of smarts. My brother Nelson has made me wiser and appreciate the beautiful things. He also made me the peace keeper, I remember when he left I was so scared, he always resolved all the fights. But when he left, I felt so small, I was sure my brothers would tear me and each other apart. But I got good at resolving the drama. So Nelson helped me with that, even though he wasn’t there, he was with me in my thoughts, coaxing me to do the right things. It feels like just yesterday he left. Just yesterday I wouldn’t leave my room for days. Just yesterday it felt like I lost everything. We’ve grown a lot since then. Became bigger and stronger people.

Alex gave me creativity. During those storms, he helped me try and capture things. But some things you can’t capture. Like that storm. No matter how hard we tried, the beauty was never there. It was, but diminished. Just like the pictures of our childhood, we were the photographers. Alex loved taking pictures. Now its my job. Because no matter whether its actually caught or not, it still helps remember what happened. And remember everything.


Simon gave me the strength to keep moving. Because we went through a lot together. More than a lot of people know. We used to always be at each others throats, but because of him, I kept pushing, even when people told me I couldn’t. He pushed me to be my best, at the time I hated it, but now… Now its what I need. His encouragement. He has made me so strong. Emotionally. And, in a way, physically.

My brothers have driven me pretty close to insane throughout my life. Heck, they still do. But I love them for it. Because our family wouldn’t be so wild if we weren’t crazy.

At times I can’t stand my family, but they are apart of who I am. I just feel bad for the poor guy who marries me. Three older brothers… Woah. He better be as crazy as we are. I don’t think I’d settle for anything less.

I know that growing up is scary. I know that it means leaving a lot behind. But it also means getting to know my brothers as men instead of boys. My parents as equals instead of superiors.

The Rosien Clan is changing. We’re all growing up. But we will always have our memories…