Thunder

Every time I hear the crash of thunder and see the strike of lightning, I think back to that time lying on my bed with my brother, trying to record it. I remember his arm around me when I was scared. And how the air was heavy with static electricity. And I remember our laughs filling the air and that was when I felt safe. I haven’t had that kind of safe in a while. I haven’t felt that care free in a while. I miss being so innocent. I miss being in the same house with my whole family. I miss being young.

My brothers were always so protective of me. They were always so funny. And they fought a lot. But we always loved each other. Through the blood, sweat, and tears. Now I finally understand what that means.

Growing up with boys has made me a stronger person. It has made me appreciate the delicate things in life, and it has made me confident.

My brothers have all given me different kind of smarts. My brother Nelson has made me wiser and appreciate the beautiful things. He also made me the peace keeper, I remember when he left I was so scared, he always resolved all the fights. But when he left, I felt so small, I was sure my brothers would tear me and each other apart. But I got good at resolving the drama. So Nelson helped me with that, even though he wasn’t there, he was with me in my thoughts, coaxing me to do the right things. It feels like just yesterday he left. Just yesterday I wouldn’t leave my room for days. Just yesterday it felt like I lost everything. We’ve grown a lot since then. Became bigger and stronger people.

Alex gave me creativity. During those storms, he helped me try and capture things. But some things you can’t capture. Like that storm. No matter how hard we tried, the beauty was never there. It was, but diminished. Just like the pictures of our childhood, we were the photographers. Alex loved taking pictures. Now its my job. Because no matter whether its actually caught or not, it still helps remember what happened. And remember everything.

lightning

Simon gave me the strength to keep moving. Because we went through a lot together. More than a lot of people know. We used to always be at each others throats, but because of him, I kept pushing, even when people told me I couldn’t. He pushed me to be my best, at the time I hated it, but now… Now its what I need. His encouragement. He has made me so strong. Emotionally. And, in a way, physically.

My brothers have driven me pretty close to insane throughout my life. Heck, they still do. But I love them for it. Because our family wouldn’t be so wild if we weren’t crazy.

At times I can’t stand my family, but they are apart of who I am. I just feel bad for the poor guy who marries me. Three older brothers… Woah. He better be as crazy as we are. I don’t think I’d settle for anything less.

I know that growing up is scary. I know that it means leaving a lot behind. But it also means getting to know my brothers as men instead of boys. My parents as equals instead of superiors.

The Rosien Clan is changing. We’re all growing up. But we will always have our memories…

4 Responses to “Thunder”

  1. Grandma Breau says:

    WOW! What a powerful story Grace! I absolutely love it. You along with your brothers have come a long way and I am very proud of all of you!
    Love, Grandma

  2. Julia Rosien says:

    Grace, reading this reminds me of my family growing up, the love and the fights, the laughter and the tears, the fear and the security. Growing up with brothers is wonderful – especially when they love you as much as yours do…as much as mine do.

    Thank for sharing our beautiful family with the world!
    Mom

  3. Amanda says:

    Beautiful post Grace! This makes me miss my younger brother greatly – who is currently tree planting out in BC for the summer.

    You are a great writer!

    • Grace says:

      Thanks so much Amanda,
      If you miss him, send him a letter. In the mail. With a photograph of the two of you and just tell him how much you miss him, and if you’re proud of him. Make sure he knows how much you love him. Cause I know, that they don’t always know. Don’t wait until it’s too late.
      Thanks! Maybe someday you’ll see my name on a book somewhere. :)

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